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Individual Counseling
for relationship challenges

BASED IN ORANGE COUNTY, SERVING ALL OF CALIFORNIA

Have any of your relationships become tense, unfulfilling, or even painful?

One of the most damaging traumas a person can experience is the violation of human connection.

 

Romantic Partnership

Perhaps you have noticed something feels different in your relationship: distance that wasn't there before, feelings of resentment creeping in, feeling unheard and under-appreciated, feeling like roommates rather than lovers, having the same talks and disagreements with no forward motion.

Understanding the cause of the cycles we repeat in our relationship allows us to have greater perspective, empathy, and resolution instead of getting lost in the argument. Feeling understood by our partner and knowing we can count on them to respond to our needs creates a healing bond and vital sense of safety and security.

Family Ties

Family dynamics can make it difficult for you to be your authentic self. Maybe your boundaries aren’t respected, your feelings don’t seem as important as theirs, you have to be the one to bend or accommodate, hearing gossip fractures feelings of trust, and you just don’t feel that sense of safety.

Navigating family dynamics can be difficult, especially on top of life's ongoing pressures. Unresolved family discord can add stress and instability to this already-delicate balance. Find your voice to be heard and understood. Refine your communication and conflict resolution skills to implement the solutions that are best for you.

Friends and Workplace

Perhaps your friendships feel unbalanced or workplace interactions just don’t sit well with you: there’s a lack of reciprocity and balance, little consideration for your needs and feelings, emotional dumping, absence of accountability— ultimately you’re left to pick up the slack.

Our emotional energy is like a checking account, and friendships and professional relationships can make significant deposits or withdrawals. If you’re feeling low on reserves, it’s time to reevaluate these relationships to see how they can be improved (or released) so you’re growing emotional wealth, not depleting it.

 If we understand what brings us close, we can create lasting connection.

Whether it’s between partners, the parent-child relationship, family members, or friends:

True connectedness comes from mutual trust, emotionally attuned attention, and timely responsiveness.

Emotionally focused therapy and attachment theory highlight the inherent need for human beings to rely on one another. Threats to these attachments trigger us into a stress response that inhibits our ability to connect and feel safe. We then develop and become stuck in negative cycles to cope with the loss of security. This manifests as resentment, anger, desperation, the silent treatment, nit-picking, criticism, anxiety, and more, making the distance between you feel even greater.

You can stop the cycle and restore the bond. Together we will:

  • Identify the negative patterns that block closeness

  • Explore and articulate the underlying needs

  • Increase mutual empathetic listening and compassionate responses

Relationship counseling can help you:

  • Understand the science and emotions of attachment

  • Heal past wounds so they don’t affect your present relationships

  • Stop having the same arguments without lasting resolution

  • Decrease resentment, frustration, and dissatisfaction

  • Reignite the spark in your romantic relantionship

  • Draw healthy boundaries to keep people IN your life, or reveal if that person deserves your time, energy, and attention

  • Feel mutual reciprocity in friendships and partnerships

Frequently asked questions about relationship therapy

  • I specialize in helping people build all types of relationships, so this can be especially helpful for individuals wanting to do couples work, but having the space and freedom to explore their relationship without their partner present in session. This can also be perfect for someone whose partner is unwilling, does not want to, or isn’t ready to participate in couples work. Our work together can be focused on your relationship, improving communication skills, recognizing your own triggers, emotional regulation, empathy in times of tension, articulating your needs, and deepening your bond.

  • Relationship therapy allows us to examine and enhance the relationships in your life, or “bless and release” the ones that don’t meet your current needs .

    Understanding attachment will help you understand fundamental emotional needs and increase your ability to engage, connect, attune, understand, empathize, and reflect on a deeper level to enrich all of your relationships, old and new.

    This can help parents communicate with their children (at any age), individuals within intense family dynamics, coworkers and colleagues, friendships—anyone you want to connect with in a healthier and more balanced way.

All is not lost. You can find your way to connection again.